I was sick and tired of my closet looking the way it did, so last Friday night I started purging. I didn’t realize the depth of my sickness until I was finished. When I was finally done grabbing and tossing there were two huge mounds of clothes piled up on my bedroom floor. The sight of it was utterly disgusting!
I can’t help thinking about how trapped I am in the empire of consumption. Something most Americans are faced with every single day but rarely gives even a second thought. We consume so much and take for granted what we actually have. Why do we always feel the need to have more?
This kind of confession is not new for me and I’ve written on this blog before about my desire to spend, but I’m troubled by the depth of this problem in my life. I know I’m guilty and I’m confessing my addiction to spending and consuming. You can see it in the picture of the six 30 gallon garbage bags filled with clothing that are still perfectly good. I’m just getting rid of them because I haven’t worn any of it for over two years and I’m tired of digging through them to find what I actually want to wear. And I’m so pathetic, I haven’t even removed the clothing from our game room yet and I’ve already gone and purchased a new shirt for the fund raising event we had last week. It makes me feel like such a hypocrite. Asking people to donate money while I spend so much on worthless and useless possessions. I’m confident I could completely fund our non-profit on my own if I didn’t carelessly consume.
It’s not a problem I face alone. Many people spend carelessly on things we think we need, but have no idea how much of a luxury it really is. What I’m really wondering is will the economic crises we are finding our country in, put a halt to all of our over spending or are we so addicted we’ll continue to spend, driving ourselves deeper and deeper in debt all in the name of self-gratification.
Have you ever noticed even when you have a huge closet filled with clothes you still tend to wear the same things every week? I know I do, so why do I feel the need to continue to buy? Is it a sickness? Is it addiction? Is there some deeper need that I’m trying to fill?
I wish I knew the answer and I wish I could stop!
Do you suffer or have a problem with spending? Especially spending on things you don’t’ need?
Do you have any suggestions you’d like to share that might help those of us with this problem to be able to stop?