Recognizing Fun

One of the things I’ve felt missing in my life recently is fun.  I just struggle with it.  I don’t know exactly why, but I often find myself working or creating things in my life that feel like work.  It’s difficult for me to be spontaneous and to do things just for fun without having any other purpose or agenda.

This weekend I had the privilege of taking photographs of friends and their family.  I love photography and would consider it my number one hobby.  But like I just said, I struggle with creating ways where it becomes naturally fun and spontaneous for me.  So, when we headed out to take the pictures, I felt kind of like it was going to be work, but I was pleasantly surprised by the results I felt afterwards.  What ended up happening was a very enjoyable, memorable, fun moment in my life.  I felt like I was totally in my element.  Like this was something I could do as a job and still have fun doing it.  And I have to admit…without bragging…I took some pretty awesome pictures of their boys.

I’m now thinking about the next opportunity I will have to take pictures.  I’m planning to carry my camera around more and I’m starting to offer my free services as an amateur photographer to other people, so I can have fun and they can have a few pictures to hang on their wall or sit on a table some place.  A win-win situation for both of us!

Do you have a hobby?  What are some of the things you do for fun?

Distorted Thinking

Here’s a list my counselor gave to me during my second session.  It’s a list of ways in which our thinking gets distorted.  After we read through them together, she asked me if I could relate to any of them and I said, “yes all of them.” 

1. All-or-nothing thinking:  You look at things in absolute, black-and-white categories.

2. Over-generalization:  You view a negative event as a never-ending pattern of defeat.

3. Mental filter:  You dwell on the negatives and ignore the positives.

4. Discounting the positives:  You insist that your accomplishments or positive qualities don’t count.

5. Jumping to conclusions:  You conclude things are bad without any definite evidence.

(a) Mind reading:  You assume that people are reacting negatively to you.

(b) Fortune-telling:  You predict that things will turn out badly.

6. Magnification or minimization:  You blow things way out of proportion or you shrink their importance.

7. Emotional reasoning:  You reason from how you feel:  “I feel like an idiot, so I must be one.”

8. “Should” statements:  You criticize yourself or other people with “shoulds,” “shouldn’ts,” “musts,” “oughts,” and “have-tos.”

9. Labeling:  Instead of saying, “I made a mistake,” you tell yourself, “I’m a jerk” or “a loser.”

10. Blame:  You blame yourself for something you weren’t entirely responsible for, or you blame other people and overlook ways that you contributed to a problem.

The nice thing about thinking is, it can be changed.  If you are a short person and would rather be tall or a tall person and would rather be short, not very easy to change.  If you’re a person who thinks in the ways listed above…have hope, it’s just incorrect thinking…and we can change and be different people.  I’m confident it will take me time, hard work and lots of practice.  I may even fail a couple million times along the way, but I know with God’s grace and help I can change my distorted ways of thinking.

Can you relate to any of the distorted ways of thinking on the list above?  Feel free to leave me a comment!

Jubilee Kids Club

I’ve got the kids from our Jubilee Kids Club on my mind today, so I thought I’d share a little with you about what we are doing.  A couple of months ago we started a new club called Jubilee Kids Club.  It’s part of the initiative of Retread, our non-profit, and the McKinney Life group I lead is helping with all the details and the volunteering.  We’ve teamed up with another non-profit, The Samaritan Inn a homeless shelter in McKinney, and have been going over once a month on Saturday’s to hang out and play with the kids there.

This is such a simple little program and one that can be duplicated over and over.  And that’s our heart, passion and goal for this club.  Our dream is to have churches, other non-profits, and volunteers all over the area connected with schools, so they can start clubs and spend time hanging out with some of the less fortunate and under privileged kids in our area.

The awesome thing about this program is there’s really no special training required.  Can you throw a football?  Can you play Monopoly?  Do you know how to swing?  Well then you’re trained and you’d be great at volunteering for this.  Oh yeah one more requirement.  Do you have extra love to give to a bunch of kids who just want a little attention and to know that someone cares enough about them to give up a few hours of their time on Saturday?

I’m excited about the possibilities God has set before us and want to trust that in His timing we’ll be touching the lives of children all around Dallas.  My prayer for the kids today at the Samaritan Inn, is that every time we are with them they know they are loved.

Proclaim freedom all over the land to everyone who lives in it–a jubilee for you.  Leviticus 25:11

Are you ready to help?

Secrets

About a year ago I read this totally amazing and shocking book.  It’s called Post Secret and there’s a whole website dedicated to it.  It was such a good book I couldn’t put it down and read the whole thing fairly quick.  What is it about reading other people’s secrets that is so interesting?  What is it about sharing your secrets that can be so freeing?

The reason I’m interested in other people’s secrets is because in some small way it makes me feel more normal.  I’m pretty sure everyone, if they would admit it, has secrets.  I certainly am carrying around my fair share.  In fact I’ve got a few right now that a couple people know about, but some of the people who are closest to me don’t.  I’ve got one as of last night my wife doesn’t even know about.  Don’t worry it’s nothing big, I just bought a new lens for my camera and haven’t told her about it yet.  Hope I didn’t have you sweating too much!

Actually, some of my secrets are really difficult to share.  They come from years of garbage that has piled so high, it’s to the point of smelling really bad.  I’ve got one right now I’m trying to deal with and have to admit, I was failing miserably at it, so I finally had to get some help.  I know you’re thinking in your head right now, “just tell us, it can’t be that big of a deal.”

Okay…I was recently diagnosed with depression…There I said it!…No more secret….now maybe I can be free of it.  Big deep breath…exhale slowly.  The difficult thing is not really knowing you are depressed, but knowing that something is wrong with you.  Of course the more I’ve been learning about depression lately, I’m finding that it effects everyone differently.  It’s also very difficult for people who aren’t depressed or know what depression feels like to understand and relate to people who are.  Thankfully, with the help of my family doctor and some medication, I’m starting to feel a little better.  I’m feeling less and less pain every day and I’m starting to have a little more energy.  I’m still not yet sleeping very well, but last night was better than it had been in months.  I’m confident that things are going to continue to get better and with the help of my counselor, someday my life will be re-shaped and better equipped to be used by God.

It’s extremely hard for me to admit this little, secret, problem, of mine.  The main reason is because I don’t want people to be disappointed in me.  I especially don’t want people to think less of me and I don’t want people to avoid me.  I guess that’s why I could relate to the picture above.  I really do want to share my secrets, but I don’t want you to run away.

So….what is your secret?